"The teeniest tiniest jar of Vaseline I've ever seen"

This morning the sky was gray and the alarm was more startling then usual.  Pulling me out of a anxiety fueled dream that left me out of breath and feeling though I was forgetting something or had forgotten something and that either way there was nothing I could do now.

In my dream I was begging you to come how. Except you were not a singular person. Instead a composite of everything that had ended in failure. Everything that continues to end in failure.  And so even now, hours after I have woken and had coffee and spent time answering emails, the sense of impending doom sits of my chest like the elephant who won't leave the room.